Past and especially today’s hustle-culture influenced society preaches if you fail, you might as well continue to strive for ‘your dream’. If you don’t go through the strict motions of hustle, and you ‘fail’ you have to keep going. There is no in between. There is no full-on quitting and/or giving up on your ‘dream.’
“To master it, you must keep going! There is no quitting! You only fail when you quit!”
While, in a way that’s true, especially when you’re on the cusp of victory in your dreams becoming a reality — sometimes you have to make a full stop and re-evaluate your reasons you want to continue with ‘hustling.’ The hustle culture, in my opinion, is extremely toxic and damaging to a person’s mental health and future opportunities that have nothing to do with what they’re pursuing. I’m speaking from experience.
Hustling was never on my radar in my youth — nor was it in my 20s. I wanted to go to school, open a business, and then thrive from there. Of course, God had other plans, ones I fought against for long periods of time.
I hustled in jobs that weren’t loyal to me, gave my all, and pushed and pushed, to no avail. I stopped chasing my own dreams and fell into the trap of someone else’s. It was, to say the least, excruciatingly disheartening.
I had to take a step back from working for a significant time (two years) so I could focus on college. I kept telling myself, “This is what I wanted, this is what I dreamed about since I graduated from high school. I can’t back out now.” Two years later, and an exhausting mental break down that depleted me of what little strength I had left, I went back into the foray of the work force. It took me four more years to get back where I wanted to be, a college student.
Fast forward two semesters back in college, and I feel I’m losing my momentum again — which brings around the question of quitting for good. Or just to take a break once more. It will furthermore push back what I want and that’s a degree in business. I don’t particularly need a degree to open and run a business, just good sense and self-discipline to learn as I go.
I want this degree to show that I accomplished something, despite adversity. To show how strong I am and how much I can accomplish if I put my all in it.
But, here lies the issue, I’m doing it for myself and not for the Glory of the Lord Most High. The verse in Colossians 3:23 reads: Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.
Because I tried to hustle so much to a dream that today’s society would approve of, I have lots of regrets…too many that have brought me to tears.
I regret not putting God first and trying to hustle in the world view rather than His. I regret pushing Him aside for my own glory and not His own. I regret pushing aside the Gospels and putting faith in myself when I could have put faith in Him and thrived under His guidance.
These regrets are one of the biggest reasons I say the hustle culture is a toxic culture, a shallow and selfish-ego driven scam. It’s fast paced with no promise of good seeds being sowed to reap great and brilliant benefits. All rotten fruit with no good future harvest in sight.
My future with college looks bleak. Whether I do return after this semester or not remains to be seen. In all fairness, what I could do now is focus on what God has been putting on my heart and put all of my faith in Him rather than society that changes with the season.